What IS a scary movie? Well in my opinion...

As I sit watching the 2005 "War of the Worlds", my whole body tense from what is happening in the movie. I think of what is considered a scary movie for me. As previously talked about I do have a fear of zombies, saying that most zombie movies do scare me. Most being the key word in that sentence the so far only two movies of the zombie sort do not scare me: "Night of the Living dead" circa 1968; and "Shaun of the Dead" 2004. The first can be more comical then scary but it does get point across (if you get what I mean). [*note: I need to tell you about some cool things I learned about zombies and zombie movies] The second is high-larious and, frankly, one of my favorite movies. Now to other "scary" movies: I have a pretty vivid imagination so most, even slightly, scary movies do give me a fright, but what I consider a good scary movie is one that has you so tense the entire time that you can forget where you are. So tense that your body feels like you just ran a marathon. And really good ones can leave you shaking in your boots and your mind reeling. "Hide and Seek", "The Secret Window", and "The Uninvited" are all what you could consider your psychological thriller, these can be scary, but for me these movies have a fast fading savor, if you will, then others. End of the World/Armageddon movies such as "War of the Worlds" and "I am Legend" are movies that kind of hit that catagory of thrillers that I like to call "Scary Movies that didn't have a budget, and you could see why." The point I am making is that there are too many "scary" movies out there that, sure they are scary and can scare you hairless. But there are gruesome, bloody, nasty, and pointless. All there were made for was to freak a person out and show them some gosh-awful things [with a PG-13 or R rating] I am sick of low budget "slasher" films. I am done with the "Saw" movies that are now going on to their 6th movie. I am not a big scary movie watcher, but when Hollywood will produce things to the caliber of such standards like "I am Legend" and "Hide and Seek" then Scary movies are worth getting scared out of your mind for. I know there is a large population of people out there that just love the gory, nasty scary movies, but can't we have class in this part of movie making too? Such and idea doesn't only need to go to high dramas and low comedies. It can be done and still scare a person speechless. Heck it's happened to me!

"They're coming to get you, Barbara!"

~Johnny Night of the Living Dead

What a shocking culture

The past week I have been trying to get my substitute teaching underway. Now that I am "official" I just need to meet with principles/ asst. principles so that I can be "official" on their lists. I have visited the junior high, two of the elementary, and I have been working on the elementary school and the middle school. I have visited the high school, but it took me twice to actually get to talk to Mr. Ray, an asst. principle there.

As I sat in the waiting area of his office, thinking "thank goodness I wasn't ever an idiot in high school to get in trouble" and how it would be interesting to substitute at the high school especially with my sister a senior there and still knowing a majority of the teachers.

But I digress...

I was waiting because Mr. Ray had a student in his office and the students mother comes into the office. She fits your typical white trash missouri hick with the wafting smell of cigs and booze. She walks into the principle's office, slaming the door behind her. The members of the waiting room though get a distinct "Well, what the H-ll have you done now?". (here on in I will be doing some editing) Now please note here that the walls of the office were pretty thin and you could here almost everything that is said. Especially when it is yelled.

From here on in the conversation made it clear what the general problem was from this student. She was missing too much school and classes. Some of it sounded medical, though from what I recollected it almost rang close to "balemia" rather then some stomach problem. This is where I just sat in disgusted awe at how rude, inconsiderate, close minded, biggity, and RACIST people are around here. The girl's reason she doesn't want to be in "that" class is because it was filled with (please forgive the crude language) "faggots" and "niggers". I wanted to burst into that office and punch the girl in the face. I can't believe how much people around her can't stand anyone who is different. I mean I don't agree with gay marriage, but I still accept homosexuals as people, the deserve just as much respect as anyone one else. And racism in general is so petty. We are all equal. Why can't people see that?

On the other side of this conversation we have the mother of this student. As described above, her manners and language matched accordingly. She first stated clearly that she didn't have time to deal with her daughter's "bull S***" and was sick of have to waste her free time on coming down to the school. From her other comments there was a general lack of true care for her daughter's actions, lack of respect, attitude, and for her daughter overall.

Obviously Mr. Ray wanted something to worked out and talked out, or he wouldn't of cared to call the mother in. He could of just given the girl saturday school and moved on. But the mom had her own head so far up her own butt, that she couldn't see anything pass her own selfish motives.

Sitting through this conversation, made me realize I missed my 99.9% mormon, small town university setting. Swearing was still there and everything, but the general respect level for others is ten times more then most people here. It has been sort of a culture shock since I have been home. I wish people can see past themselves and that there are other people out there, who need their help. Common courteously can still happen, it should not be dead.

"Life is not so short but that there is always time for courtesy"

~Ralph Waldo Emerson.

One of those "ultimate" disappointment moments

So, yesterday I decided that I was going to figure out what classes I needed to take to finish up my schooling. As of two semesters ago I had three semesters left. That means I should currently have two left. That leads me into today's little adventure, you could say. I call the academic advising center so rather than spending hours on the school website looking for my catalogue and all of the classes required for my major/minor I could just be directed straight there. This is when the first "bomb" is set off. I was informed by the advisor lady that I hadn't, after 6 semesters mind you, declared my minor. FURTHER, That the English credits that I have taken up to this point, note that being 8 in total, only two fulfill any requirements. And more sadly both were for my G.E's. So it boils down to that Katie has no hope of finishing school in 2 semesters (plus student teaching) but, in fact, a rough estimate of 5.

[pause of exasperated sigh]

This is where I spent the majority of my day figuring out my real schedule and then informing my parents that I am going to be in school for QUITE some time.

I want say that its "all good" that "such is life" but really I just want to be frustrated. Even if my "two" semesters ended up being three. It just feels so much better then 5. But There is Katie Ludlow's mid-week crisis.

I am sure this will be a good thing, I have faith that it will.

"Frankly Scarlet, I don't give a damn"

-Gone with the wind

Kinemortophobia

There are people out there that have Arachnephobia, the fear of spiders, Hyspsiphobia, the fear of heights, Coulrophobia, the fear of clowns, or even Paraskevidekatriaphobia, the fear of Fridy the 13th. There are thousands of "phobias" out there in this world, but I have Kinemortophobia or as the professionals say, The "irrational" fear of Zombies. [pause for dramatic effect] Yes this is true. I know you are laughing as you read it but I do have a fear of zombies and it may be "irrational" but it is there. Don't quite know how it started or when was that big realization of when I was scared of them, but they seem to stubble, no real pun intended, into my dreams making any somewhat normal dream into a nightmare.

In the history of fears in my life, which isn't very long overall, I have eventually gotten over several of my phobia's in the past. Spiders, naw. Swimming in lakes, a piece of cake. Talking to boys, almost a professional. Reading Shakespeare, slowly but surely getting there. Just kidding on those last two. Boys are just stupid not scary. (Haha)

My point is that I would think that something like this, a fear of zombies, would just pass by. My mind really realizing that Zombies are in fact Not Real, and I can not fear desert parking lots at night with fog rolling in mysteriously as a distant ominous moan is heard in the rather nearby distance. Yeah, my imagination tends to get a little crazy sometimes.

Though I have been told that I do have a rather irrational fear of zombies. I do have one and that maybe someday I will get over. BUT until that day I shall always have my "zombie survival guide" book handy at all times, just in case of an emergency, and to always remember that a chainsaw without gas is about as useful against attacking zombies as a AM/FM radio.

No matter how "irrational" your fears may be, take comfort that this crazy theatre major from a small hick town has one of the most "irrational" fears of all.

Just in case of an zombie invasion here are some quick tricks to remember:

1. Organize before they rise!

2. They feel no fear, why should you?

3. Use your head: cut off theirs.

4. Blades don't need reloading.

5. Ideal protection: tight clothes, short hair.

6. Get up the stair case, then destroy it.

7. Get out of the car, get onto the bike.

8. Keep moving, keep low, keep quiet, keep alert!

9. No place is safe, only safer.

10. The zombie may be gone, but the treat lives on.

~The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead

By: Max Brooks

[Read it... you'll get a good laugh out of it.]

Be kind and learn to be a real person!

There is a line from one of my favorite TV shows Firefly, "You're going to burn in a very special level of hell. A level they reserve for child molesters and people who talk at the theater." That last bit is my point for this blog, plus some other points that need to be made. I have been back in my hometown for the first time in about a year and a half. I have been in living about place where people are people, don't get me wrong, but they seem to have just a little more common courtesy then anyone in this hick town.

I just this weekend went and saw, for the 2nd time, the excellent show Sherlock Holmes. I sat through that movie and had to endure people getting up and down on several occasions, chatting with their neighbors, and flashing their cellphones when texting. I don't care if I had seen that movie already. I don't care if they don't care they spent $8.25 and are now wasting that movie by not watching it. If you want to text, talk, and walk around do it OUTSIDE!

I thinking about this instance makes me reflect on life in general here in this small town. Compared to life in a small town several of miles away on the other side of the country, it really makes the place look like a hick town where people do not understand the concept of being considerate. I can't stand how people are obviously judging you before you even speak to them, I rage at how people can't even show the littlest measure of decorum.

It is an idea that is certainly on the increase but it is a thing that can never be forgotten. We need to be examples to others, though saying that I can't promise that I won't chew out the guy behind me who keeps up a running commentary in a movie theatre. I wasn't saying I was perfect.

Also From Firefly:

Mal: "Patients were cynical and not responding and we couldn't bring 'em back-"

Simon: "They were cyanotic and not responsive."

A "love" poem from a good friend Sharlyn!

It is strange to think, I haven't seen you since a month. I have seen the new moon, but not you. I have seen sunsets and sunrises, but nothing of your beautiful face. The pieces of my broken heart are so small that they could be passed through the eye of a needle. I miss you like the sun misses the flower; like the sun misses the flower in the depths of winter. Instead of beauty to direct its light to, the heart hardens like the frozen world your absence has banished me to. I next compete in the city of Paris, I will find it empty and in the winter if you are not there. Hope guides me, that is what gets me through the day and the night. The hope that after you're gone from my sight, it will not be the last time that I look upon you.

love you forever and you know it,
Sharlyn

Being an Idiot is an Idiotic thing to do...

Why does it sometimes takes people to experience a consequence many times over before it is drilled into their little heads that they are doing something wrong and sort of screwing over their futures. I am one of those before mentioned people. I recent pondering and such I have realized I haven't allowed myself the full amazing undertaking as I could because I got..., well there is no other word for it, lazy. As I have been trying to catch up on my reading in the Book of Mormon, I continually come across questions and inquiries about it. This is very obviously very normal, but it made me realize that I really want to retake my Book of Mormon Classes and Seminary. Because I have a new, better desire to really understand what i was suppose to be studying. I then further realized that this was the case for several if not all my classes I have taken both in high school and college. I need to take in as much as I can. I need to realize that to not do so is IDIOTIC! Argh.

I really have been screwing with a future that could be filled with a lot more knowledge and understanding then it will be. All because I didn't want to put forth real effort into a class. All because i was a idiot . I am a disappointment to myself. Failed.

WELL, with saying all of this I shall press on with a new attitude and fresh convictions. That is a good thing to do. Yeah.

This post didn't turn out as long as my others, but i might have another thought that will come to my head. I am just happy to have a little release point for my random thoughts, frustrations, and personal praises.

Oh I miss Rexburg a lot, and can't wait to go back.

"To thine own self be true" ~Polonius Hamlet by William Shakespeare.

What am I doing with my life?

It is 1:19 am and here I lay in bed in front of my beat up mac book waiting for my "Veronica Mars" episode to completely load. It is now when I realize that I am seriously slacking in some of my new year resolutions. Crap. I am a day behind on reading AND haven't excerised AND I didn't write a post for today...as in yesterday. As of about a hour and a half ago. Dang I fail only 6 slash 7 days in and I can't seem to keep to any kind of schedule. It really is my fault in all this. It is just hard when the temptation of having no reason to wake up before eleven in the afternoon and to go to bed be for three in the morning. I will soon have a job shortly, if you were worried, and I do have the one act to occupy some of my thinking and actual time. I can go into details more about auditions that happen ... yesterday later. I really need to get into a schedule I need to try and go to bed at least by twelve at the very VERY latest. Hopefully starting there I can get into some resemblance of a non-chaotic life style. This is sort of an unspoken goal for me this year is not to be a slacker. Put forth some REAL effort. Real effort being a constant thing also, not just when I feel it convenient.

Well now that I've given me some abuse lets all pray I can get myself into shape for a real constructive life.

NOW! AUDITIONS!

First: I love directing.

I am sorry you have to hear me go on about theatre and everything, but I do (as before mentioned several several times already) LOVE THEATRE! ha. Well to make it a shorter story then I would probably write, auditions when really well. I had 6 people audition which is just enough for my 6 person cast. I did have to cast a girl as a guy, but they were so brilliant in the auditions that I know after a lot of hard work, some good direction (from yours truly) and having some fun they will create a great show. Now that I do have the show casted the games begin. I am trying to figure out everything for it. What time to place it in so I can figure costumes, What the set is going to look like and where I am going to get all the furniture, If I am going to do step by step blocking or let them try their creativity out a little. So many different details I don't know where to start finding them. That is okay, I have my mom's, lil' sis's and of course Ms. J's help and opinions to go to for all this. I could probably ask Chalise also...she being the expert in these matters.

I am, in short, really psyched for this whole process and I am ready, for the most part, for this challenge. Don't worry I will keep updating you on this process over the next months and off course of the rest of my goals also. Well friends, I better sign off for now and finish my episode, go to bed and take on another slightly boring day in good 'ole hometown Missouri.

And for todays Quote:

"Take an Umbrella...it's raining" The Curious Savage

"Hey Mr. Director"

I love theatre.

Whoa, glad I got that off my chest. I think I have established that fact a little already in my last post, but I wanted this post to be dedicated to my next theatrical venture. I have taken on the task of casting and directing a thirty minute one act for a high school one act competition. So I have got the piece picked out already. I am doing a cutting from the first act of the play Over the River and Through the Woods by Joe DiPiero. This is the same play I had my quote from on my last post. It is this very fun, witty, straight comedy. It is truly a delightful play that has hit my top ten beloved plays list (which may be discussed on another post).

It is the story of these two sets of grandparents both strong brooklyn Italians who have always been about family. Their life mantra is "Tengo Familigia" or in english that means something along the lines of "to support a family". In the beginning of the play through a series of asides the audience finds out about the grandparents life stories, how they got to where they are now, and how much family means to them. Nicky, the grandson of these grandparents, thinks they are loud, nosy, and nuts. So the story goes is that Nicky got a grand promotion at work but this promotion has one big stipulation. He has to move all the way across the country from is home town of new york where he has lived all his life to Seattle. Nicky thinks this is a opportunity of a life time. He thinks what a better time when he was still young, unattached, ready for change, and no real reason to stay there. His grandparents object when hearing this. He's got them. Wasn't that enough for him to stay there for? By the end of the first half of the first act Grandma Emma has a plan thought up to keep Nicky right where he was. He needed to get married and she knew just a person to do so. On other side notes we learn that Grandpa Nunzio, husband of Emma, has cancer that he knows that if Nicky leaves he'll probably never see grandpa Nunz alive again. This information hasn't been known to anyone at this time not even Nunz beloved wife Emma.

So we go to the second half the first act: The lights come up to the same apartment of Grandparents Aida and Frank. Both grandparents are there getting ready for their usual sunday dinner with Nicky. Unbeknownst to Nicky there was to be a guest that evening. Who could it be but the "Caitlin O'Hare the unmarried niece of [Emma's] canasta partner". She is everything the grandparents could ask for--young, beautiful, a great cook, and loving. Nicky is so embarrassed by his grandparents he acts like a idiot/jerk the entire dinner. He finds he does like Caitlin and that Emma did "do good." Upon Caitlin's departure he asks Caitlin on a real date which she turns him down flat telling him that he was a jerk and rather rude to his obviously loving and caring grandparents. When he tells his grandparents that it didn't work he flies off the handle telling them that he doesn't want their help. He yells at them hurting his grandparents very deeply. In the midst of his rant he doubles over having a hard time to breathing and collapses. Nicky has had an anxiety attack...I mean "Nicky was always an anxious baby." End of Act I.

Not wanting to completely spoil the whole show for you and hopefully encouraging you to read this amazing play, I will stop their with my slightly confusing synopsis. This segment described here is the the cutting I am using for the one act competition. I am excited to direct it but I first have to cast it. I have get the script edited and cut down to hopefully be under 30 minutes though I may have to cut some more of it. The auditions for it are tomorrow and I am nervous. I know that sounds so silly, but I am paranoid that I am not going to cast it well, that I am going to miss the right talent and that I am going disappoint the teacher I am doing this for and my little sister who is being my stage manager. I just hope from my auditioning experience and observing other director will help me in this task. When I get that done the fun starts. I mean I haven't really directed a show. . .I got a taste of directing this semester with semi-directing a short children's theatre scene for a class but other than that and sort of directing for scenes and skits I've written and performed for random classes/talent shows my actual directing experience is rather limited. Saying I do feel that I have a slight natural feel for directing theatrical things. I just need to simpler, especially for this production where resources and time are sketchy and thin.

This really is a great challenge to take on. I love theatre so much and to get this group of high schoolers to get a taste of some real good kind of theatre, is a warm fuzzy. My ultimate dream to take my passion for theatre and teach children of all ages and help them see that theatre is a perfect outlet for many things that may be going on in their lives.

Now, I guess I can keep you posted on the development of this little shin-dig. I just hope that it will pan out. That good things will happen. That I could maybe, how minute or slight it may be, influence some of these teenagers. SO "parting is such sweet sorrow".

And the quote for today, also from the Bard is:

"My words fly up, my thoughts remain below: Words without thoughts never to heaven go."

~King Claudius Hamlet by William Shakespeare

Blogger?

Hello internet world Katie Ludlow has entered as a brand new blogger. I have gone and done something foolish and made this a new year resolution. This being a blog. Yes, I have decided that in the many years of failed attempts of journal writing, that maybe now I can get something close to it by blogging. So I have a few disclaimers my future readers. I may be a english minor, but I am not a good speller and I tend to have poor grammer (usually not intentionally). This is more going to be what thoughts or things that come to my mind rather than a "This is what I did today..." So If anyone does end up reading this bear with a rather inexperienced writer and someone who tends to be quite silly sometimes. Now to explain the title of my blog, "All the World's a stage: And I'm merely a player", Firstly I love Shakespeare. I am a theatre major at BYU-Idaho and have slowly grown to enjoy our beloved Bard. And with that added piece of information for you, I picked this name also because I do feel that my life, my world is a stage and I am the star player on it. Hmm, does that sound conceded enough? I just hope that what I write can not only maybe entertain or enlighten those out there who might read this, but will let me get into some sort of ... i am not even sure what you could call. This year is a year for great change and decisions for me and I hope this will help that along. Speaking of the new year some new year resolutions i have for this year are:
1. Read the Book of Mormon in a month
2. Lose 50 lbs by April
3. Finishing writing the first draft of my play
4. Prepare for a mission even if I don't go on one.
Do they sound intense? Sure do for me. Sorry for those who are lost on the Book of Mormon/mission thing. I am not really blogging to preach or anything but a bit of my religion may appear in my blogs.
I am excited for this new feat in my life and I hope that it will only be positive.

So to leave with a quote from a good play (since I am a lover of theatre):
"Thirty years ago, I ate at a Chinese restaurant. To this day, I have no idea what I ate."
~Aida from Over the River and Through the Woods by Joe DiPiero